Overheard: Benidorm

I went to Benidorm last week for Benidorm Fest and kept my ears open for interesting chit-chat. Here's what I heard:

• The thing is, I've been friends wi' Gary for thirty-five year
  
  
• I've got a curry club in Leatherhead when I get back on Thursday
  
  
• Oh that's another thing I did with me mince, I made myself a burger...
  
  
• We're on the yellow now... well it's more lemon that, in't it?

Circle Lines | Madrid Metro Line 6

I was in Madrid earlier this year, and decided to resume a blog series idea - riding a circular metro line.

Madrid's circular line - Línea 6 Circular - goes through 28 stations. I started and ended at the cavernous Principe Pio.

Madrid metro trains have no internal doors, so you can see all along the carriages. At Laguna station, the doors of the train opened on both sides. Never seen that before!

And here's who I saw:

- A man sleeping, a woman sniffling

- A woman speaking on her phone about this and that, ending the call with a low aaaaahhhhh

- A man in a flat-cap dashing along the platform

- A woman carrying toilet rolls laughing heartily with her companion.

- A man on crutches, watching cartoons on his phone

- A woman singing a song into a karaoke microphone, and everyone ignoring her.

- A man selling lollipops from a small green plastic basket. His blue back-pack had the words 'Kings of Europe' written on it.

- A young man on his phone - I was standing up, so could see the screen: he looked at memes, then nail cosmetics tutorials and then started playing chess

- A very tall young man, dressed in monochrome, untangling his white earphones

Variations on a Brazilian flag

When I was in Belgium, I saw this flag hanging from a building. It's the Brazilian flag re-purposed with Belgian colours.

I love this take on the Brazilian flag, re-purposed to support Belgium in this year's football World Cup.

So I decided to make a few more flags:

 This could be any number of countries - Australia, Costa Rica, Chile, France, Croatia.

Cameroon.

Colombia or Ecuador

Netherlands - though I suspect they're more likely to have a big, bright orange flag.

Germany

 Portugal

1

Iran or Mexico or Italy

Ivory Coast

 Nigeria

Spain

Switzerland

Uruguay or Bosnia and Herzegovina

Top 10 Prado Portraits

During my visit to Madrid, I paid a visit to the Prado Museum - or the National Museu del Prado to give it its full title. The museum was filled with stunning landscapes, biblical scenes and cleverly positioned classical paintings, but I was particularly partial to the many portraits on display.

Here are my 10 favourite portraits from the Prado.

Maria Isabel of Braganza was the Spanish queen whose collection founded the basis of the Prado museum. Queen Maria Isabel had a great affection for art, but something suggests artists didn't have the same affection for her as she's been painted in a rather unflattering, miserable pose.

Maria Amalia of Saxony has a rather fabulous red frock.




This painting of Saint Dominic is lavish, with gold decoration throughout and even extending out of the picture - the frame was topped with gold Gothic cathedral spires.

This portrait of a rich, young boy seems to tell you all you need to know about the man this child will grow up to become.

This painting is of a small girl, Eugenia Martinex Vallejo. She was very over-weight and perhaps even disabled. Aged 6, she was taken to the Spanish court to be put on display, pointed at, and stared at. The poor child! Hanging near this painting is a nude portrait of the girl, which makes her seem all the more poignant.

This portrait cleverly (and a little spookily) shows the artist and his family.

On a list of favourite queens, Maria Luisa must rank high. She looks like a game lass, perched high on her horse, always up for a bit of craic.

Speaking of horses, here's the Duke of Lerma in a powerful pose and portrait. Although this really is a much better portrait of his horse, a glamorous beast.

Here's Maria Theresa, formidable Queen of Hungary and Croatia, Archduchess of Austria, Queen of Bohemia and Empress consort of the Holy Roman Empire. But this portrait shows her as a little girl, a very different image of her than we have today.

And, finally, Maria Cristina of the Two Sicilies, bearer not only of a fantastic name but also a rather fabulous hat.



There are thousands more paintings and artworks in the Prado Museum, many of which can be explored on their website.

Salamanca Siesta

On top of slightly wintery weather in Madrid, I picked up a touch of stomach flu, so I was feeling a little wobbly and not super-happy.

By the third day of my trip, my tummy was feeling more robust so I decided - quite on a whim as I passed by - to stop in a little local bar in Salamanca.

Inside, it was decorated very typically Spanish - terracotta tiles, wood-lined walls painted dark red, jamón hanging from the walls.

As I sat with my drink, feeling pleased that the barman had called me 'caballero', I watched the other customers.

• A slightly swaying drunk guy good-naturedly chatting up a woman who laughed along when he won on the slot machine.
• A pony-tailed old guy fixing the cigarette machine, whilst warble-whistling along to Christina Aguilera's Beautiful and hum-singing along to Taylor Swift's Trouble.
• A woman silently drinking her coffee within minutes, who, as she leaves, turns to the staff and says, "no hay mucho blah blah blah" while pointing at her mouth.

Madrid's square life

Normally, the first thing I do when I arrived in a new city is head upwards.

I climb towers, cathedrals and columns to see the city laid out before me, seeing how the streets interlock and the buildings interconnect (or not).

Madrid doesn't have any obvious buildings to climb, so I stayed down, sitting in Puerta del Sol and Plaza Mayor watching life unfold all around. I saw:

• Street entertainers galore in Plaza Mayor:
• A grown man playing a baby, reacting with childish glee or annoyance every time someone walked past.
• Three men sat in a bin, only their heads visible.
• Person dressed as a very unusual creature, with a costume consisting of a wooden bird-beak / goat-like head and a body of long strips of glittery foil.
• Tourists turning the corner into the square, exclaiming, "well, now, look at all this art!"
• Glamourous grand dames of a certain age being ferried around in Porsches and Range Rovers whilst wearing huge sunglasses and perfectly coiffured hair.
• In Puerto del Sol, socialists, communists and anarchists all protesting against capitalism mixed with Mickey Mouse, Goofy, The Simpsons and Hello Kitty characters wandering around.

Madrid Architecture

I've recently come back from a trip to Madrid. The buildings there are a mix and styles and influences, reflecting different cultures and rulers - Moorish, Austrian, French, Spanish - mixing over the centuries.

The weather was not kind to me in Madrid, with cloudy, milky, grey-white skies almost throughout my stay.

I decided, then, to splash in some colour from the city's flowers (many of which were growing in the botanic garden) which contrast nicely with the pale, ice-cream colours of the ornate architecture.

Incidentally, I did something similar with these photos of Rome, taking out the sky and putting in the colours of the Italian flag.

UK to Spain, from above

I took these great aerial photos on a flight from London to Gibraltar, and then the return flight from Seville to London.

World Cup in London: Netherlands & Spain

Or: Voetbal! Football with London's Dutch fans & Futbol! Football with London's Spanish fans

To watch the World Cup Final last night, I had planned to be with Dutch fans singing Hup Holland Hup! But with queues outside Dutch bar De Hems from 10am, it didn't look like I'd be getting in there.

In fact, nearly all of Soho was awash with red and orange yesterday - jolly fans all singing and dancing, wearing fun costumes and having a very good time.

In the end, me and two friends settled in Devonshire Arms, a bar where on one side there were mainly Dutch fans and on the other side mainly Spanish fans. The best of both worlds!

We placed ourselves firmly in the middle - I was rooting for both sides: Netherlands winning would have made me super-happy, Spain winning would have made me £135. Win-win all round.

The game was really not the most exciting, but the fans made up for it: chanting Ho-lland and Es-pan-a, sometimes breaking out into song.

As the game dragged on, their enthusiasm did not wane, but everyone was on tenterhooks until near the very end when Spain scored. Joy to the left of me, dejection to the right.

Once the match ended, the Spanish fans poured out onto the streets. A group of women went running past cheering and waving flags. Piccadilly Circus was awash was red and yellow, people climbing all the way up the Eros to celebrate, sing and dance. One man even dropped his trousers giving us all quite an eyeful.

And with the sights and sounds of Spain celebrates, I slipped away.

So that's the World Cup. From brilliant Brazilians to gallant Ghanians to surprised Slovenians and unhappy Uruguayans, it's been quite a show.

Flags, made of paper

My newest fun thing to do is to make collage flags from bits of scrap paper. I recently changed jobs, and made these flags for colleagues to say farewell.
UK flag

USA flag


Australia flag



Kent flag


Sicily flag



Wales flag


India flag



Nepal flag


Berlin flag


Cuba flag



Ukraine flag



Ethiopia flag



Madagascar flag


Philippines flag



Ireland flag


France flag


Ibiza flag